Joke's Created 19 years ago2004-07-09 18:00:08 UTC by SassyPenguin SassyPenguin

Created 19 years ago2004-07-09 18:00:08 UTC by SassyPenguin SassyPenguin

Posted 19 years ago2004-07-09 18:00:08 UTC Post #40015
your so ugly when you where born the docter slapped your mom

your mom is like a hockey player she doesnt change her pads for three periods.

your so stupid you spent 3 hours looking at an orange cartain because it said 'concentrate'

your momma so fat she bunji jumped off a bridge and the bridge came with her! :lol:

:add more jokes!
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-09 20:03:13 UTC Post #40044
you so damn stupid you think there funny. :|
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-09 20:14:26 UTC Post #40048
i agree, all go: :|

this is like the tenth thread for jokes.

These jokes are sooo funny, i forgot to laugh! :lol: no... :|
Luke LukeLuke
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-10 10:08:50 UTC Post #40189
Your jokes are so unfunny that they make Jim Davidson look like a god-figure
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-10 10:23:54 UTC Post #40192
Those 'You're so whatever that whatever.' jokes suck.
Rub me!
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-10 17:44:27 UTC Post #40281
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-10 19:28:10 UTC Post #40297
mine is funny. :nuts:
Luke LukeLuke
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-11 06:17:47 UTC Post #40376
:|
Seventh-Monkey Seventh-MonkeyPretty nifty
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-11 07:40:16 UTC Post #40390
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-11 08:52:39 UTC Post #40409
do
echo(':|');
loop
Seventh-Monkey Seventh-MonkeyPretty nifty
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-11 09:04:37 UTC Post #40415
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-11 11:10:16 UTC Post #40434
:
Luke LukeLuke
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-11 12:38:21 UTC Post #40447
Hahahah!

builds on seventh's wisdom:

<?
do
echo(' :| ');
loop
?>

(you need the space to make the smily)
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-11 12:48:04 UTC Post #40451
Who said it was PHP? ;)
Seventh-Monkey Seventh-MonkeyPretty nifty
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-14 13:31:20 UTC Post #41326
echo ?
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-14 13:35:15 UTC Post #41327
What's brown and sounds like a bell? DUNG!

Why is bad beer so much like making love in a canoe? It's f**king close to water!
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-14 14:42:47 UTC Post #41343
echo is DOS console, Lin. console, prolly a lot more :)
Seventh-Monkey Seventh-MonkeyPretty nifty
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-14 17:15:14 UTC Post #41380
have you ever been so drunk that you peed your bed? But you werent in the bed, you were standing at the end?

lol, :lol: .
Luke LukeLuke
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-14 22:39:40 UTC Post #41448
No, but I swear there's no blood in my alcohol stream, Officer.
RabidMonkey RabidMonkeymapmapmapfapmap
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-15 04:57:02 UTC Post #41500
Haha, a german joke:
Warum kann man Bier um den Hals tragen wenn es lange steht?
Weil es dann schal wird!!!
Muhahaha!
Bet you didn't understand it. Too bad. It doesn't work in english, because it's a pun.
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-15 06:03:28 UTC Post #41509
I don't speak enough German to understand that....ah well.
RabidMonkey RabidMonkeymapmapmapfapmap
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-15 06:55:30 UTC Post #41516
das ist nich gut
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-15 11:30:57 UTC Post #41576
shut up you depp!
Luke LukeLuke
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-15 13:56:59 UTC Post #41620
Ok, when somone comes up with a joke that makes people laugh (i did chuckle at the first one i must admit) Thats when you start a joke thread.
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-15 14:14:28 UTC Post #41627
An Engliosh man, an Arab and Scotsman are traveling through the forest when they come across what appears to be a burial ground. They each take a step onto the ground when suddenly - Whoosh. The tribe whos graveyard there treading on jump out of the bushes around them.

They all begin screaming and shouting at the Englishman, The Scott and the Arab and shaking there spears in the air. The tribes leader steps foward and says they have difiled there holy ground and must kiss the ground infront of the graveyard and then recive fourty lashes for each step they took on the holy soil.

The tribe leader goes on to say that they will be lashed on this blood stained podium but that they can have anything of there choice on there back to help with the pain.

The scotts man is first, he kneels down by the graveyard and kiss's the soil, then he steps up onto a podium to be lashed.

"Ah I dont need nothing on my back, gimme the lashin!"

So they do, fourty lashes, lash lash lash. The scots man steps down from the podium his back bleeding badly.

The Arab is next in line, He kneels down and kisses the soil infront of the gravyard and then he steps up to the podium.

"Can I please have my back coated in oil to help with the pain?"

So, the tribe people oil his back up and give him fourty lash's. Lash lash lash. He stepps down from the podium his back bleeding badly.

Now its the Englishmans turn, the tribe leader motions him to kiss the ground. Instead the Englishman jumps onto the holy ground and beginss stamping his feet as fast as he can. The tribesmen reach in and pull him away and drag him before the tribe leader. The tribe leader says;

"Now you shall be lashed fourty times for every step you took on the holy ground aswell as the first fourty"

The Englishman says;

"Thats ok I want the Arab strapped to my back!"

Hahaha, very long winded version of a joke I heard in the pub, I think its class.
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-15 15:31:00 UTC Post #41645
i didnt think it was that funny. Mabe when your drunk?!?!? :confused:
Luke LukeLuke
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-15 16:54:54 UTC Post #41678
dont we just rock? we dont need no back protection!
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-15 19:21:07 UTC Post #41719
riiiiiggghhht...
Luke LukeLuke
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-21 15:59:30 UTC Post #43503
User posted image
lol that's funny for me :D I hope it's not going to be censored (i find nothing offensing, nothing bad i think :) ) cool eh?
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-21 16:35:22 UTC Post #43522
:
Well.
I don't wanna be him.
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-21 17:08:53 UTC Post #43540
I don't wanna be him
Agreed.
RabidMonkey RabidMonkeymapmapmapfapmap
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-21 17:30:40 UTC Post #43552
... :confused:
Luke LukeLuke
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-22 04:24:29 UTC Post #43666
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-22 04:26:53 UTC Post #43668
Don't you have sense of humor? :|
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-22 08:10:16 UTC Post #43715
i have a family....
Luke LukeLuke
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-22 15:16:52 UTC Post #43805
HAHAHA that cartoon is class
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-22 15:35:07 UTC Post #43807
Here's one:

A doctor, a Jew, and a lawyer walk into a bar.
The bartender says, "What is this, a joke?"

I heard it from one of my friends, I don't know why he thought it was funny, just posting it to let you know how dumb ppl are. :P
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-22 16:49:52 UTC Post #43820
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-22 18:02:23 UTC Post #43830
Conclution: Its a non funny common joke :D!
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-22 18:15:05 UTC Post #43836
yes :D no.... ;)
Luke LukeLuke
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-22 18:27:35 UTC Post #43840
It's a so-called Anti-joke.
Things like: 'Jill is walking down a road, Steve's got five bucks too.'
Ok, this one is really really bad.
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-22 19:11:29 UTC Post #43850
SPILL IT!!!! We... I love bad jokes... no i dont... Ah but i hate being in suspence...
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-22 19:15:01 UTC Post #43851
Your mommas so fat when she wears high heels she strikes Oil.

Your mommas so fat her belt size is equator (old)

Your mommas so fat she felll down the grand canyon and got stuck (also old)

Your mommas so fat when she turns round they throw a welcome back party

Your mommas so fat I had to take a train and two busses to get on her good side.

Your mommas so fat her class photo was taken from space.

Your mommas so fat when she was sat in class at school she sat next to everyone!

Your mommas so fat your dad had to slap her thigh and ride the wave in.
Posted 19 years ago2004-07-23 05:00:54 UTC Post #43937
holy mother shit! do take your mom! You can be accursed. Ups...i say mother shit.....
oh ya for all your joke...hahahahaha i laugh for.....not...not for your joke but i lauge cause see you cat ieatmonkeychow! :D
Posted 19 years ago2004-08-11 06:52:11 UTC Post #50073
I will translete what hazardous say....you people in amerika never take shower at morning because the whinter is so cool. I luck no live in amerika.Muhahaha!
What..whay you looking at me, I just translete hazardous say.... :P
Posted 19 years ago2004-08-11 07:25:54 UTC Post #50086
OMG i think that all post like "How do i make a map in game counter-strike, and what is half-life?" are funnier than this "Joke's" thread. Maybe i have diffrent sense of humor becouse i don't live in America(where peoples think like: He have two legs! Hahhahaha, i can't take it!, or your mother is stupid whore, hahahahaa! very funny :/ ). Well, realy, maybe it is funny, but not in Poland.
Posted 19 years ago2004-08-11 08:05:51 UTC Post #50096
A man walks into a bar. Ouch.
Seventh-Monkey Seventh-MonkeyPretty nifty
Posted 19 years ago2004-08-11 09:06:08 UTC Post #50121
amazing seventh.
the timing of that was impecable, with perfectly balanced sense of humor and reality, it was funny yet poses as a reminder to us all that we should not walk into a bar ever, the joke also, in its own little way, prevents us not to become alcoholic by scaring us because it could hurt, the punctuation of that was incredible.
Seventh, you really are a king among men.
Posted 19 years ago2004-08-11 09:07:53 UTC Post #50123
Wjat?!?11~~
Posted 19 years ago2004-08-11 09:08:12 UTC Post #50124
amen brother.
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