aim_snipe-it

You shouldn't ever upload your first map. Ever. Train in private first.

Fuck up srry. This is a beginner site, so he can get feed back for his first map. Back on topic, you just have to move on from under-detailed one hour maps, people wanna see something impressive, you should line up your brush work and vary the textures, fix up that glass too. Also fix the ladders appearance. It's not a bad start, you are already learning about some useful entities. I won't give you a star because it wouldn't be justice, this being your first map and all.

It's a generally accepted rule, not something I came up with. I didn't know anybody disagreed. :

Actually mcmitcho srry is right. You never ever ever ever ever ever ever ever etc. POST YOUR FIRST MAP. JUST NO. Unless your first map is better than deliciously great, you just don't.

i agree with srry, but i doubt this is actually a first map. I believe "first real map" or however it's phrased is the proper term for maps like these.

After all, aren't most actual FIRST maps the cube from the in the beginning tutorials, filled with stupidly numerous monsters? i know mine was =]

Anyways, regarading the map itself - you're showing some clear potential.

thanks for all your guys comments , yes mabye some ppl do not post there first maps but i like to hear whats wrong with my map and how i can fix it so the next map i make can be better so thank you.

As far as i'm concerned there is NO rule concerning first maps. This is a place to learn, isn't it?

You really shouldn't release maps like this.

That was incredibly helpful.

Give him some feedback or something and don't be an asshole.

Alright, first of all, since this is your first map, I believe you should have put it in "unfinished stuff" instead of "completed maps". It strikes me as more of a test map than anything else, and this isn't really what people are looking for when they go through here to download maps.

That's not what matters though. If this is really your first map beyond the simple cube, then you're doing a really really good job. You're definitely getting those entities down, which is obvious from seeing that func_rotating fan, the door with the button, the colored lighting, and the use of the transparent "{" grate texture. Most people get by without using these things for quite a while after they've started mapping. I know I did.

Anyway, you need constructive criticism if you're ever going to improve, not just compliments.

Something you really need to work on is your architecture. Now, I won't stress this too much, since you are a beginner, but this is an area you really need to improve in. You seem competent enough in the basics of it, but you really need to focus on designing something more realistic. This tower thing here, it doesn't have a real-life counterpart, and you can't really tell what it's supposed to be, or what its purpose is. I suppose that's fine for a test map, but if you're looking to move on to better things you'll have to start approaching this in a different manner.

Now, along with architecture, you're going to need to improve your texturing drastically. The ones you've chosen for this map are honestly pretty horrendous. You should never use the same texture you used for the walls on the floor, since not only will it make everything look very redundant, but textures that are made for walls aren't meant to go on floors, and vice versa. Other than that, your choices don't really make any sense. You need to grasp that certain textures are meant for certain places, and while it can be good to improvise, this often times leads to confused looking maps. At least when you begin, you should try and stick to the textures that are meant for what you're trying to do. (Visit http://wadfather.planethalflife.gamespy.com to download other texture packs if you find Half-Life's default textures rather constricting.)

The lighting is something else that got on my nerves. It's good that this wasn't another fullbright catastrophe, but you should always have your light coming from somewhere, instead of just placing light entities everywhere. TWHL has an excellent tutorial on texture lighting. Read that and you'll discover it's much better than what you're using now, since it requires an actual source of the light.

A few other details now (keep in mind that these wouldn't be mere details if this was anything other than a learning map.)

On the door at the bottom of the tower, the button you used was very oversized, and oddly stretched if I remember correctly. Textures should usually never be stretched out of their normal proportions, although they can be evenly upscaled in both directions if you're making large outdoor maps. Anyway, something else you could have done for that button is give it an animated texture. Then, when you pressed the button, the texture would switch to a different one, and the end appearance is quite a bit more appealing than a static texture. It just makes the map feel more alive and interactive.

Another thing I notice that seemed a bit strange was that your ladder used a transparent texture, but you didn't utilize this, so it was just black in the middle. You made the grating on the side of the building transparent, why no this ladder too?

Well, that's all for this time, and I'll give you a rating to offset the horribly unhelpful one that hydeph gave you.

thank you very much srry that has helped me much more than your previous post , i also had known that the button texture was way stretched but not sure on how to scale it down although the texture it self does change it is jsut very very very hard to tell but thank you very much (i have now gotten a MASSIVE texture pack which i have had help from in how to assemble it in so that it doesnt take up very much room thank you once again , luke