So, ya, we really need a blog. I guess this will have to do to clear my mind.

Now, have you ever just thought... WTF.

About everything, about life. Why your alive..

I've been thinking of those words for a couple days now. I don't get it.
I've came close to death 4 fuckin' times now

1. I was 2, and had a little cough, I was brought to the hospital, they told my parents that if they never brought me in, I had a 85% chance of dieing the night. I was diagnosed with asthma.

2. Me and my brother went to visit our real dad. Billy was playing in the back under a blanket, and I was up front acting like I was driving. Accidently popped the car into neutral. The car was on a hill, and right behind us was a cliff (steep hill) with trees. Luckily I left the front door open, and a single tree stopped the car. Ruined the door, but saved my life.

3. Me and my family where celebrating something at a church when my ventolin puffer went out. It was the same day I caught emonia (Satchmo, you here? hows it spelled..?) I was rushed to the hospital with my head sticking out the window to get enough oxygen. We made it, and I was hospitalized for 3 days.

4. Recently diagnosed with a brain tumour. Would have died if amber stayed just a half-hour later at her grandmothers house.

I mean like, wtf is this, is there a reason I'm still here!? There must be some reason that the devil wants me dead so badly. And why god has kept me alive. Even the doctor who operated on me said I had a slim chance of surviving, 'it was as if there was a third person in the room guiding my hands' he said to me.

I just wish I knew.