Forum posts

PalO, being a programming is a pretty crappy job. Basically you do boring code, then someone higher up gets credit for your work, getting paid much more than you. It would be great if you were coding for something you actually cared about, but the sad fact is that it will probably be for more effecient toilet management systems and so forth.

Well, I just heard there will be a 15% reduction in posts where I work, so when 'i grow up', say, around February, I'll probably be a dolie again.

I loved the Superman films, and still do. But its not a REAL tribute for gods sake. They dont HAVE to be sick jokes, just funny ones.

Thats exactly what trapt has in mind....and you can always use that timer sprite to 'dazzle' the judges.

Page [1] | Replies: 13 | Reply
Anyone know any good superman/christopher reeve jokes? Nothing too sick, mind. Posted on 11 Oct 04 11:39
by Mephs

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Who is the opposite of Christopher Reeve?
Christopher Walken!

Ho ho!

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Posted on 11 Oct 04 11:51
by Mephs

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Poor guy...
Can't think of any at the moment though

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Posted on 11 Oct 04 11:51
by Anthony

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Tom and Clark were standing on the roof of their building drinking a few beers on their break and Clark said, "Hey Tom, did you know that if you jump off this building, after you get down so far, a draft will pull you back inside the building on the third floor?"
"Get outta here," said Clark.
"No I'm serious, watch me."

Clark hopped off the building and sure enough, he was taken in by the draft at the third floor window. He took the elevator back to the top and Tom and a security guard that arrived were standing there, Tom in awe.

"I can't believe it." Said Tom.
"I know you should try it Tom."

So Tom hopped off and plunged into the ground.
"Superman you're an asshole when you're drunk." said the security guard.

(i heard a crapper version of that one time, this is obviously the proper version)

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Posted on 11 Oct 04 11:56
by Mephs

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What is the difference between christopher reeves and O.j Simpson?

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Posted on 11 Oct 04 11:58
by [DDHLP-C]copper

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christopher reeves got the electric chair and o.j walked

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Posted on 11 Oct 04 11:59
by [DDHLP-C]copper

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Posted on 11 Oct 04 11:59
by Mephs

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Crap! This was meant to be in Stuff. Silly Me!

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Posted on 11 Oct 04 12:00
by Mephs

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whats black and loud?

stevie wonder answering the iron

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Posted on 11 Oct 04 12:04
by [DDHLP-C]copper

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to late now lol

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Posted on 11 Oct 04 12:09
by [DDHLP-C]copper

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2 women walking home pissed from the boozer dying for a piss. Whilst walking through the graveyard they decide to answer the call of nature. Alas, our intrepid ladies have no toilet paper. One of the ladies uses her knickers to wipe herself with and throws them away. The other, trying to be move resourceful, finds a ribbon from a nearby wreath that had been left on a freshly made grave and uses that.
The next day, the husbands are talking. One says to the other "We better keep an eye on our 2 birds, mine came home last night with no knickers on" The other husband replies "you think that's bad? Mine came home with a card hanging out of her arsethat said "From all the lads at the station,we'll never forget you...."

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Posted on 11 Oct 04 12:09
by [DDHLP-C]copper

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Funny, but NOT SUPERMAN JOKES. Foo!

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Posted on 11 Oct 04 12:18
by Mephs

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i know give some variety

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Posted on 11 Oct 04 12:22
by [DDHLP-C]copper

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Also, I'm coming to break your fucking spine, and then I'm going to point and laugh and spit on you, you insensitive fucking shit.
Black and Loud, haha - that's funny because there's a story of a Texan moron answering his revolver at 3am, and never waking up again..

Oh no, a horror map!!

True! I suspect foul play...if a map fitting the criteria for the competition mysteriously appears in the mapvault a day before the compo starts, I'm going to hunt you down, monkeh

Tell me, Mr. Anderson, how can you post this if..you cannot speak....

*staples Neos mouth closed.....for a laugh

I dont know jack schit about matrix online.....'bullet time' is an obviously idiotic idea online.....but if the CSer try to h4x the matrix, i dont mind

And don't be impatient. Things take their time.

Indeed....take something he loves, and threaten to kill it!(like Andy for example )

But seriously, im honestly afraid of too many people sending atom glitches and him just cracking up and closing the whole thing!

But yes, that annoys me too! (but as haz said, so many other things are MORE annoying). That said, it DOES work very, very well, given the thousands of ppl who flock upon the Half Life Mecca that it is!

This thread might help: http://www.cariad.co.za/twhl/forums.php?action=viewthread&str=web%20hosting&type=1&pg=1&id=4184

Its not a bad map at all....its merely over the top. Therefore I declare that Jahzel, rather than be chastised, should be celebrated for creating the new sport of "EXTREME MAPPING"

Don't listen to idiots who tell you not to listen to people*

*Excluding myself and his Modship, Seventh-Monkey

*wishes cancer on habboi.

Ya, paste it in your journal and pull the plug on this thread, mate!

no, its as free as the air you breathe, my friend!
mirc is shareware though, so after 30 days it nags you to buy it.

die_anthony.bsp that sounds like a better name!

Hmm....suppose I could call this fooked up stairways map I'm working on mephus. Or mephicentre. Or mephs' mephtacular mephsus mephicentre.

...to join the #twhl chatroom if you haven't already.

Without beginners mappers coming in to ask questions, the channel isn't being used to its full potential.
It's fun, i'ts free, it's IRC!

It couldnt be simpler to join:
Get an IRC client: The most popular one is mIRC (download it from www.mirc.com); some alternatives are Visual IRC and IceChat.

Join the Chatbear server: Add a new server called "irc.chatbear.com"
Join the channel: If you're using mIRC, in the status window type "/join #twhl"

The rest is easy!

Things you are missing out on by not joining:
Instant Mapping help from our resident know-it-alls!
General banter with regulars
Marvin's exciting WWII stories
Slapping Marvin
Mostly-uninformed arguing about browser superiority

Acrobat? wtf! .rmf, .map you mean?
You can compile your map using Hammer. I suggest you read all the basic tutorails...

.midi? I dont think so....

Yes....my Mephsus.rmf (theres some clipping to do to it first though, I'm getting a max_clip_nodes error)

lol
jk

The architectural style could be stolen and used in my map*

Let sleeping posts lie, idiot.

The layout of the map is too DM-orientated to fit any kind of SP mission around (besides fillling it up with random enemies, which if you do, I'll personally have you shot ). The architectural style could be borrowed in another map, but I think that's 'bout it.

Seventh: corrected, and trust me, that hyphen's in the right place

I dont think it would, really.

STFU!

jk

who in turn got it from.....space reptiles....blah blah......Bob Hope and the Queen Mum....

The olny way to make this thing fully insvisible is to make the light go around it.

Like my idea?

-changing player speeds
-changing over all health
player and enemys
-enemys made from scrach

Post this in some form that makes sense.

worse yet, chow's is greater than mine.

I dont know of any specifically hl greek stuff, but try looking up stone textures and greek mosaics etc in google.

What way do toilets flush if they are situated exactly on the equator?

And have a func_button trigger it....

Exactly. Rather than have the heated debates spoil this site (it IS only for mapping y'know!) carry them out off site.

It was DEFINATELY 1 of 2 members of twhl, I don't know which one so I won't name names. Actually I wouldnt name names anyway.

Essentially anonymous, by failing to post under your own account name, you have made everyone pissed off at anonymous posts. I'm sure you'd agree that this is pretty unfair to guests at the site.

Its basically more 'jahzel' orientated than twhl orientated chow, since that stuff seems to incite rioting amongst the less cultured members jk

try http://invisionfree.com/ to have a simple (and free) forum.

TWHL (The Whole Half-Life)


http://cariad.co.za/twhl/

Probably one of the world's leading Half-Life resource sites.

Nay, sir. THE number one:

http://www.gamesites200.com/halflife/vote.php?id=15

Good stuff. In that case I can laugh like a lunatic at the humour, and smash every conspiracy you come up with one by one.

The important thing isnt whether or not its a freewebs template, its that you fill it with conspiracies and that damn wierd humour of yours.

Ok....hands up who can model good enough to require a vault to show off their work? Now, hands up who can't. Please wait patiently while I count the hands...

A common mistake of a beginner is to instantly want to create an entire mod. This is a case of trying to run before you can walk. In my opinion, DONT make a full mod.

That requires coding and so forth, which really isnt worth the effort, unless your maps are of five star quality.

True, spark...
I always wondered if there was a way to weave tiny fibre optic cables into some kind of a suit, so that each end would pass the light from one side to the other, around the wearer. This guys idea seems better. And probably works. And isnt stupid. And its a hoodie. Darn japanese, always one step ahead of me!!

Ok...if i was just joining a site and read the down through that thread I'd be terrified. What yak? Whose yak?

Mods being able to freeze posting to threads would also be handy once they start going way off topic, a 95% reduction in spam methinks.

Welcome <new member> to TWHL. You should <Generic Advice>.
You seem <Generic Compliment>. Good luck! <appropriate smilie>

I have NO idea why you said that. It REALLY isnt at all. But this is a help thread (which we have more or less ruined).

Get anything coherent out of all that gibbusoft?

I can VERY safely say I never used any terms such as noob, haxor, or pwned without being VERY sarcastic.

Look, its pointless trying to say that CS is better than half life. Half life is THE GAME. It has a gripping unfolding plot, puzzles, horror, crowbar and aliens. Lets just say that half life is great for ages 13 and up. If you want non stop, no brain action then CS is good for that. And don't give me all that 'strategy' bs. Run, shoot, kill/die (delete where applicible). As Anthony said (and yes I did open it up again, me and my big mouth!)

Half-Life smashes CS hands down. No questions asked. No objections. End of story.

trigger a series of hurts and camera stuff

I for one hadn't a clue what you meant by that.

"Stuff" isnt the most in depth description of using negative values for trigger_hurt! But then....what with me being 'special'