Yes, it's time to come up with some lame* mapping jokes!
*freakin' awesome
What did the compiller say to the cheap condom?
LEAK LEAK LEAK
Bodgy Mapping Jokes!
Created 16 years ago2007-07-07 08:15:59 UTC by
AJ
Created 16 years ago2007-07-07 08:15:59 UTC by
AJ
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-07 08:15:59 UTC
Post #227700
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-07 08:17:11 UTC
Post #227701
...so i say "Compiler?! I only just MET 'er!"
What did one brush say to the other? "You square!"
What did one brush say to the other? "You square!"
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-07 08:27:05 UTC
Post #227704
What did Half-Life say to the guy that was quick in the sack?
Dude! cl_maxfps 450!
Dude! cl_maxfps 450!
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-07 08:47:30 UTC
Post #227710
o lawd.
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-07 08:55:42 UTC
Post #227713
What did the compiler say when big mama came on the server?
--Error.
---System over load.
i guess this one was dry -.- couldn't thing of anything
--Error.
---System over load.
i guess this one was dry -.- couldn't thing of anything
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-07 09:00:55 UTC
Post #227716
thats not even a joke, let alone bad.
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-07 09:02:22 UTC
Post #227717
Your mom's so fat the source engine can't handle her.
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-07 09:07:12 UTC
Post #227719
my mom doesn't even know what cs is tho.
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-07 09:25:28 UTC
Post #227725
-Nighttime doesn't happen because of the Earth's rotation. It's just that 'Teh Hammer God' compiles a new version of our world for every new day, and the time needed for a full RAD goes from dusk til dawn.
-Desertification is one of the consequences of a bad VIS, since water doesn't render properly.
-What entity is referred to as the 'girlfriend entity'? Light_dynamic, of course. Pretty to look at, but if you're not careful it ends up consumming most of your resources!
-Regarding how mappers view people, ugly faces fall into three categories: bumpmapped (acne), misaligned (ugly) and malformed (self-explanatory).
-What did the wad texture say to the vtf material? You're schizophrenic. No one can be reflective, refractive, bumpmapped, transparent and animated at the same time
I'll think up more.
-Desertification is one of the consequences of a bad VIS, since water doesn't render properly.
-What entity is referred to as the 'girlfriend entity'? Light_dynamic, of course. Pretty to look at, but if you're not careful it ends up consumming most of your resources!
-Regarding how mappers view people, ugly faces fall into three categories: bumpmapped (acne), misaligned (ugly) and malformed (self-explanatory).
-What did the wad texture say to the vtf material? You're schizophrenic. No one can be reflective, refractive, bumpmapped, transparent and animated at the same time
I'll think up more.
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-07 09:26:20 UTC
Post #227727
head in hands
Ghetto. leave.
Why do hammer 3.5 and Hammer 4 never get along?
Because of numerous coding differences.
Ghetto. leave.
Why do hammer 3.5 and Hammer 4 never get along?
Because of numerous coding differences.
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-07 09:31:46 UTC
Post #227729
Why should you never carve??
Because Hammers aren't meant to!
har har har
Because Hammers aren't meant to!
har har har
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-07 09:35:44 UTC
Post #227733
Why did the brush refuse use of the NULL texture?
Because he didn't want to end up like his old friend, a 2-faced bastard.
Because he didn't want to end up like his old friend, a 2-faced bastard.
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-07 09:42:32 UTC
Post #227734
Terrible, terrible stuff people.
And by that I mean good job, keep 'em coming. =D
And by that I mean good job, keep 'em coming. =D
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-07 09:50:52 UTC
Post #227735
In the film "The Truman Show", Truman touched the skybox because the map wasn't properly clipped.
http://www.long-sunday.net/photos/uncategorized/truman_show.jpg
http://www.long-sunday.net/photos/uncategorized/truman_show.jpg
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-07 10:00:39 UTC
Post #227737
Why do vampires hate noobs?
Fulbright!
o noes
Fulbright!
o noes
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-07 11:23:50 UTC
Post #227750
Why did the World Crafter's map beat Tetsuo's in the race?
His had higher r_speeds.
Edit:
His had higher r_speeds.
Edit:
-What did the wad texture say to the vtf material? You're schizophrenic. No one can be reflective, refractive, bumpmapped, transparent and animated at the same timeCome on, you know vtfs can't be all those things at once. The VMT pulls the elements together.
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-07 11:26:23 UTC
Post #227752
I have a humour tumour in my brain.
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-07 11:55:58 UTC
Post #227766
Well, you can save envmap masks and alpha channels in the same vtf file
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-07 11:58:10 UTC
Post #227768
Reflection masks can be saved into the same file as the diffuse texture? I thought you could only make a uniform reflection with just a diffuse 
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-07 12:06:51 UTC
Post #227772
Well, the Photoshop vtf plugin gives you a lot of options in that sense. Bump maps and refraction maps still need a vtf of their own. But they can carry their envmap masks with them.
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-07 12:15:46 UTC
Post #227773
Why do hammer 3.5 and Hammer 4 never get along?I lol'd so hard on that one for some reason.
Because of numerous coding differences.
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-08 10:04:13 UTC
Post #227925
CS:S humour!
[SS] Ant: Man, I'm lagging like a penis with erectile dysfunction
[SS] Ant: Man, I'm lagging like a penis with erectile dysfunction
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-08 11:14:14 UTC
Post #227933
Hahaha Kasperg at that Truman Show one. Also funny Ghetto.
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-08 12:13:07 UTC
Post #227941
A mapper wakes up with one helluva hungover:
"Oh ffs, not the monster-stuck-in-wall error again.."
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Mapper.
Mapper who?
A mapper with the hammer! BAM!
You can't get any lamer than this..
"Oh ffs, not the monster-stuck-in-wall error again.."
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Mapper.
Mapper who?
A mapper with the hammer! BAM!
You can't get any lamer than this..
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-09 05:15:43 UTC
Post #228049
Ok how about:
what did the TWHL members say when they played my ww1 map? (no its not released)
"Why can a map about a war so bad be so good?!"
ahha!! ha? oh forget it.....
what did the TWHL members say when they played my ww1 map? (no its not released)
"Why can a map about a war so bad be so good?!"
ahha!! ha? oh forget it.....
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-09 16:51:01 UTC
Post #228138
lmao these are so fucking bad...but the thing is their hilarious at the same time ^^. proceed.
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-09 16:55:56 UTC
Post #228139
What did the disgruntled point entity say to the brush?
Get carved, asshole.
Get carved, asshole.
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-09 16:59:48 UTC
Post #228141
What did the pissed mapper do to cs_assault?
He ripped it a new asshole.
He ripped it a new asshole.
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-09 17:03:06 UTC
Post #228144
What did the prop_physics entity say to the trigger_gravity?
I'm falling for you.
I'm falling for you.
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-09 17:06:29 UTC
Post #228145
Why couldn't the game_ext ever get his driver's liscence?
Because he would always crash after talking.
Because he would always crash after talking.
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-09 17:06:33 UTC
Post #228146
What did tommy14 say to the compile log?
Quit yer bitchin
Quit yer bitchin
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-09 17:21:27 UTC
Post #228148
-What entity is referred to as the 'girlfriend entity'? Light_dynamic, of course. Pretty to look at, but if you're not careful it ends up consumming most of your resources!I lol'd.
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-09 18:52:03 UTC
Post #228149
Q: Whats the best way to reduce a maps poly count?
A: Throw a shit load of crackers outside the level.
Q: What do you do if your map has too many brushes?
A: Shave it
Q: Why can't bankers make maps?
A: They always destroy them after seeing the void.
Q: Which mods are the best in bed?
A: The ones with huge wads!
Q: Who was the first ever mapper?
A: Noah. He built an arc.
ValvE have recently been taken to court over and incident involving their own brand of toenail clippers. Several people used it in the wrong direction and disappeared!
A: Throw a shit load of crackers outside the level.
Q: What do you do if your map has too many brushes?
A: Shave it
Q: Why can't bankers make maps?
A: They always destroy them after seeing the void.
Q: Which mods are the best in bed?
A: The ones with huge wads!
Q: Who was the first ever mapper?
A: Noah. He built an arc.
ValvE have recently been taken to court over and incident involving their own brand of toenail clippers. Several people used it in the wrong direction and disappeared!
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-09 19:01:52 UTC
Post #228150
i lol'd at all except the last one which leaves me blank.
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-09 19:11:15 UTC
Post #228151
Apparently they forgot to hit Shift+W and instead of cutting off the nail, they cut off everything but it.
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-09 19:45:23 UTC
Post #228152
Caboose wins.
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-09 20:08:32 UTC
Post #228155
how did the wall keep running wet paint from comming off? it pushed the texture lock button!1!!!!!!111!
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-09 21:05:46 UTC
Post #228159
Only you could fail at bodgy mapping jokes...
!1!!!!!!111!
!1!!!!!!111!
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-09 21:54:11 UTC
Post #228163
i lol'd at all except the last one which leaves me blank.Toenail clippers as in the clipping tool. People would use them the wrong way and would clip off their body and leave their toenails.
I hate explaining jokes
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-09 22:42:54 UTC
Post #228165
NineTnine, it would be slightly funnier if your worded things better.
And stop trying to promote your friggin' WWI map. Nobody cares.
And stop trying to promote your friggin' WWI map. Nobody cares.
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-09 23:03:06 UTC
Post #228166
*my ponit about insults, srry
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-09 23:26:09 UTC
Post #228171
What ponit is that? Everybody's giving you a hard time now, it's not just me.
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-09 23:30:57 UTC
Post #228173
Who else? eh?
saw1833? yeah, perhaps
Luke? isnt he like that to everyone?
go on, name more
saw1833? yeah, perhaps
Luke? isnt he like that to everyone?
go on, name more
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-09 23:47:19 UTC
Post #228176
I give NineTnine a hard time? Really?
BTW, ninetnine, take the time to actually make your jokes good... cuz yours suck ass.
BTW, ninetnine, take the time to actually make your jokes good... cuz yours suck ass.
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-09 23:52:29 UTC
Post #228177
well........ saw1833 not as much
srry does the most, though
srry does the most, though
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-09 23:57:21 UTC
Post #228179
I hate explaining jokesDon't bother, because
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-10 01:35:05 UTC
Post #228192
urbanebula's poly and wad joke win.
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-10 09:28:24 UTC
Post #228209
What did the half-life mapper say to Andrea Rincon?
A: "...errr........errrm......."
A: "...errr........errrm......."
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-10 09:50:09 UTC
Post #228215
Q: Why is every n00b map constipated?
A: They're blocked.
I act with scripted_sequences or info_nodes until prompted to use my pre-programmed AI when reacting to a player or other NPC depeding on my alliance to them or being killed, therefore I am.
A: They're blocked.
I act with scripted_sequences or info_nodes until prompted to use my pre-programmed AI when reacting to a player or other NPC depeding on my alliance to them or being killed, therefore I am.
Posted 16 years ago2007-07-10 10:27:54 UTC
Post #228221
srry does the most, thoughi hate you faaar more than srry does.
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