Friendly advice: you have to stop becoming so unmotivated every time you hit an obstacle, and most importantly, you have to stop considering yourself a failure and write posts on the Internet telling everyone how miserable you are. That's simply going to lead you nowhere. And, at least speaking for myself, I don't appreciate seeing others uselessly bashing themselves instead of trying to improve, no matter the difficulties they might encounter.
We all have to begin learning or doing something from scratch. We're not born with already fully developed skills or abilities. We have to slowly build them up over time. That will not only make us better at something, but it will also make us more confident of our abilities (and of ourselves). So just try to get into the mindset of learning something, and learn it well, without feeling hopelessly discouraged every time you encounter even just a minor difficulty. Challenge yourself to learn it a few hours everyday, or even just every two or three days, but be constant. Only in that way you'll ever be able to achieve anything.
Most importantly, stop thinking that complaining will solve anything.