Forum posts

Posted 18 years ago2006-05-27 16:02:11 UTC
in Star Trek out-take Post #182272
its not an out-take, its from 'spoof-trek' hence why it doesnt have any proper bridge crew in it. I saw it on a star trek night many years ago
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-27 16:00:35 UTC
in Keep your jesus off my penis Post #182270
It has a vague basis in history and mythology, thats about it.
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-27 15:58:06 UTC
in The New VIEW OUT YOUR WINDOW thread Post #182268
must... incite.. religious... debate.. somehow
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-27 15:52:05 UTC
in Keep your jesus off my penis Post #182264
There are some quite vocal aethiests if you watch some of the BBC docs on religion I've been watching recently, but given two of them had only a few months to live it was rather strange to say the least.

For once I agree with nickelplate, if only because your post essentially says that a state sponsored removal of religion is wrong, well obviously.
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-27 13:53:47 UTC
in Keep your jesus off my penis Post #182248
Im pretty certain theres a greater majority than over here, despite what the statistics say. I think a lot of people do say their christian because being agnostic or aethiest is still 'taboo'
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-27 12:10:05 UTC
in The New VIEW OUT YOUR WINDOW thread Post #182239
wheres Galese?
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-27 08:18:12 UTC
in The New VIEW OUT YOUR WINDOW thread Post #182228
GKid: Milton Keynes?
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-27 04:51:56 UTC
in Keep your jesus off my penis Post #182215
I already said the UK ironically has a state-sponsored religion, what I'm more amazed is that 71% of the UK said they were christian in 2001, could've fooled me!

For all intents and purposes, including official ones, London IS the capital. Theres no point debating centuries old legislation that makes no sense anymore, except the Bible.
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-27 04:43:23 UTC
in The New VIEW OUT YOUR WINDOW thread Post #182214
I live WAY out...
I always thought you were an east coast liberal
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-26 17:07:32 UTC
in The New VIEW OUT YOUR WINDOW thread Post #182172
too much HDR on the second image, try adjusting your RAD settings
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-26 03:45:53 UTC
in Keep your jesus off my penis Post #182092
can you ask for a dollar without 'in god we trust' on it
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-25 19:21:20 UTC
in Lava Tut please? Post #182070
combine a func_liquidise with a func_rock
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-25 13:46:17 UTC
in The New VIEW OUT YOUR WINDOW thread Post #182019
Snow in the middle of May? Its against god that is!
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-25 13:08:22 UTC
in Descriptive writing Post #182010
Ive never been a fan of the novelisation of the actual fighting of war myself, 'action' prose is very hard to accomplish without it becoming 'bang splat kapow whoosh, whoops johnny trod on a mine'. Maybe you should try a third person/narrator perspective, set the story more and avoid so many short, sharp sentences. Cursing/gore are also perhaps best left out.

To aid you with this I have rewritten your exerpt in the natural selection universe, I hope you see where I am coming from.

Im going In
Combat chapter one
by Jobabob

My fingers rested nervously on the cold steel of my gun, a conflict between flesh and metal. I?d heard all the propaganda, all the ?motivational? tapes were drilled into us back at basic. But nothing would stop the fear, or that irksome feeling that this was a one-way trip. My fellow crew looked anxious, laden with apprehension and fear, silence gripped our throats and gave no voices. Out the viewport, the looming presence of the S.S.Seventh blocked out the stars, our target, and the source of the alien infestation in the area. Sure this was a routine mission, at least back at command, for me nothing was routine, it was my first, and they?d put me in the initial wave, the ?suicide company?.

My thoughts drifted to that of those already lost in this god forsaken battle. I?ve seen ships come back with a handful of the squad left, or with emotional wrecks quivering with terror and ultimate confusion, no hope for rehabilitation. How did I get into this mess? What was I doing here on this damn ship, I was stupid, this war was stupid, this wont make me a man, all I can hope for is a painless death.

The ship docked with the squeal and clang of a thousand pounds of metal on metal, yet leaving us with only the mometary jolt, a solitary reminder we were there and leaving my trail of thought to dissapate into concern. Our commander quickly ordered us to the back of the ship, home to the insertion phase gate. I?ve heard enough stories to know why in dire cases they can call them ?phase bait?. We huddled onto the pad together, now was no longer the time for nerves.

Green.

The teleporter blast hit me in the face like a leaping skulk, as soon as all feeling left my body, we were in. This was it, my first mission out of the simulator, a cold breeze from under my feet moved up through my armour to remind me this was real. Tension was high, I looked towards my squadmates, they looked back, there was only one thing on our minds, just waiting for the moment to say it, we were afraid. We all moved into some basic guarding positions based on what layout we could see, I took cover behind the main doorway.

A scampering was heard. Johnson looked over to me and whispered something.. in my state I couldn?t have heard an onos scream at point blank. ?Say what?? I stammered back, my lips like jelly with my ear pressed to the wall.

Suddenly he blurted out - ?I SAID WHOS GOING TO BE THE COMMMANDER F F S!?

All I could think of was what had got into him, when the man guarding the vent shouted to our leader ?HEY COMMANDER GET IN THE CHAIR NOW!?

?NO WAY MAN, I WAS COMMANDER LAST GAME, SOMEONE ELSE DO IT?
?GET IN THE CHAIR OR ILL GET AN ADMIN!?
?FINE ILL DO IT AGAIN JESUS PEOPLE YOU ARE SO G@Y SOMETIMES!?

I had no idea at this point, random accusations and gibberish flying over the room. We were supposed to be guarding against an imminent and repetitive onslaught by the Kharaa and they stood there bickering words and acronyms I had no comprehension of, my mind wandered, and focused on that awful noise of bone on metal.

There was sound all around us, they were near. As soon as I?d heard it they were upon us, aliens from all directions charged, jumping at us, biting, screaming, it was an awesome sight, for an onlooker at least. I squeezed the trigger of my gun and let loose a metal storm upon the nearest kharaa, a few blotches on its skin and it keeled over sideways with a groan. The others fell as fast, everything went quiet. A splatter of blood landed on my right shoulder, I looked up just as a lone skulk jumped off towards a squad mate, teeth bared for attack. I jumped out the way only to hear a sickening crunch as bone met armour and flesh, at this point I just didn?t want to know.

I lay on the floor, the air ripe with the sound of heavy machinery, yet not of our voices. I made the decision to turn around and survey the damage.
Standing there, with no visible damage at all was the squadmate, unscathed with a dead kharaa lying at his feet.

The blow must have driven him into the insanity I have seen before, shouting nonsense like ?OMG GIVE ME A MEDPACK PLEASE COMMANDER (press space)? into his headset. Sometimes I think I can explain anything, till I saw a white pack with a red cross appear at his feet, the sight of a medkit. He picked it up and suddenly, just looked ?better?, the miracles of modern medicine, yet how they work may never be understood by this simple soldier.

I had began work on construction the commander had laid out for us, when I too was attacked without warning, the other soldiers had run off with screams of ?gay commander? and ?o m f g im gonna ramboooo!11?, I had no backup, my gun was holstered while I held +use, I was f**ked. The skulk tore me apart as I finished the portal, I was dead.

The most bizarre feeling of limbo crept over me, I was flying and saw the ship laid out before me, yet outside of this was an infinite expanse of nothing. As I tried to reach it my soul was thrown back into reality, I collapsed on the floor unconscious.

For some reason I felt the strange urge to continually shout 3 letter acronyms and the word 'hax' at some words and numbers slowly coming into my vision. I felt trapped, I reached out to get my gun, all I felt was lukewarm plastic, and a dreaded 'click' noise.

I awoke to find myself trapped in the pa$t, facing mirror images that were not my own and driven by some unknown force, to ch@nge histor3 for the better!. I was gonna kick SUM ALIEN BUTT Y?HAW!

I SHOUTED ?JETPACK OMG JETPCK NOW PLZZ KTHXBI!!? followed by a CONSECUTIVE Series of ONES down my MiC. ONE APPEARED ON ME AND I FLEW OFF WITH MY TEAMMATES who were there also. WE GOT TO THE HIVE and SHOT it with our new HMG PWNAGE WAEPONS AND IT WAS FUN AND THEN THE HIVE DIED.

All of a sudden there was a beeping noise in my ears, down to the bone the most irritating noise I had ever heard. I threw my headset on the floor, the noise only became louder, throbbing every vain in my head, it felt ready to explode. All I could do was empty my last clip into the pitiful obese lump that was the gorge, the last kharaa left and the bastard that started this whole mess. With its dying breath it uttered 'o.m.g... pistol.. haxor..'

AS I SHOT MY LAST BULET I HELD BACKSPACE AND FLASHED MY LIGHT A BILLION TIMES A SECOND AT HIM TO SHOW HIM HE WAS DEAD AND I LAUGHED A LOT HEHEHEHEH AND SO DID MY TEAMMATES TOO EXCEPT THE ONES WHO SAID I HAD FLASHLIGHT HAX HAHA NOOBS. SO I PLAYED WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS DOWN THE HEADSET AND THEY ALL THOUGH IT WAS MEGA FUNNY.

I heard an orchestra, a sudden charge of bow on string, building louder and louder. These mystical sounds may never be explained, but it was sweet music to my ears, it felt satisfying without knowing why, IT WAS TEH BEST GAME EVA!!!11

THE EDN!11

On a sidenote I dont actually like natural selection.
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-25 07:24:51 UTC
in Keep your jesus off my penis Post #181978
I very much doubt one will ever be elected
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-25 03:53:33 UTC
in Torus trooper Post #181959
Does PC gamer still cater for the 12-18 market with its bright happy colours and minimal editorial/review quality? Saying that, I just threw away 4 years of cover disks because my room was getting a bit full.
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-25 03:51:18 UTC
in Keep your jesus off my penis Post #181958
I did, nihilism is the belief in, well, nothing

albiet it really means a belief that existence is pointless because there is nothing to accomplish, you die eventually so why live, that kind of thing. My housemate became a total sad moaning goth nihilist in the third year of uni, so we kicked him out before he dragged us into his cesspit of a soul. Which was nice.

Putting 'belivers' and 'non-believers' as two sides of a coin vying for power only has a basis in the States, in a country as aethiest as the UK there is no such struggle. Anyway, please stop going on like you are 'fighting for power' when you already control EVERY STAGE OF GOVERNMENT, even the supreme court, god I really feel for the powerless right in the US.
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-24 14:13:02 UTC
in The New VIEW OUT YOUR WINDOW thread Post #181870
no only joking, I actually live on the top of reagents park, havent you seen my house?
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-24 13:57:46 UTC
in The New VIEW OUT YOUR WINDOW thread Post #181867
if only the entire property wasnt situated next to an animal fat rendering plant! at least we have all the candles we could ever need
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-24 13:44:44 UTC
in Keep your jesus off my penis Post #181865
i'm frothing at the mouth trying to come up with more rush limberg adjectives but can only think of daily mail headlines
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-24 13:39:27 UTC
in Keep your jesus off my penis Post #181862
you're a member of the factinista, a kerry-ite, a smelly unwashed hippy, a wimpy pacifist, anti-freedom, a flag burner, against democracy freedom and the american way and a commie nazi flip flopping promotor of terrorism
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-24 13:32:29 UTC
in The New VIEW OUT YOUR WINDOW thread Post #181859
http://www.jobsmaps.com/other/pictures/bedroom_panorama.jpg
(not 56k friendly)

A shot I just took and stiched together with the most idiot proof piece of software i've ever used, 'panorama composer', took literally 1 minute to make this. Those are my two cars because i'm super rich (meaning super company car and super mums-old-car-we-are-keeping-till-it-breaks-because-its-useful)
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-24 12:27:36 UTC
in Keep your jesus off my penis Post #181827
I was being serious for once, you can tell by the factual statements in the post.

I refuse to accept your refusal to be intolerant orpheus, go take your liberal wishy-washy flip-flopping anti-gun pro-life democrat nonsense and geeeet owwwwt. Dey took our jerbs!
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-24 12:24:15 UTC
in The New VIEW OUT YOUR WINDOW thread Post #181826
my room doesn't have any windows

or DOORS

oooooooooooooh! spooky noise
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-24 09:35:46 UTC
in Keep your jesus off my penis Post #181775
of course, but allah is the one true god and mohammed spoke for him, jesus was not the son of allah

allah and god are the same anyway, all those religions come from the same area and its mythology and history
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-24 05:46:21 UTC
in Keep your jesus off my penis Post #181757
ironically, for such an aethiest nation the UK has a state sponsored faith

I believe myself as a very tolerant christian, it doesnt matter if you are jew, muslim, christian or hindu, there are infinate paths towards accepting jesus christ as your lord and personal saviour
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-23 19:05:52 UTC
in Keep your jesus off my penis Post #181716
no the point is they try to convert people, aethiests dont go around preaching the benefits of nihilism. The church, if by 'church' you mean a religious faith not strictly christianity, is remarkably INtolerant when it comes to things like sexuality, promiscuity or even gender in extreme cases. The sad thing is that catholics and protestants cant get on because of a few different interpretations of the bible, the problems in ireland have shown that.

I think a more important debate is why people get so worked up about having someone make a stupid song about their beliefs. I'd honestly get sooooo riled up about a fundamentalist christian rapping about how i'll goto hell and how a belief in nothing is in some way related to my penis size.
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-23 14:04:36 UTC
in Keep your jesus off my penis Post #181670
That song was offensive because he was obviously a homosexual
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-23 05:16:25 UTC
in PSP Model Post #181619
I've informed Sony of your copyright infringement
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-23 05:15:41 UTC
in Keep your jesus off my penis Post #181618
I believe comedy should be strictly controlled by the state, mocking religion should be punishable by death from the high orders of the commendant, all hail lucius III our glorious eternal leader.
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-23 03:18:40 UTC
in Keep your jesus off my penis Post #181603
I believe Jesus was a haemaphrodite and slept with both mary magdelen and mohammed
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-22 15:07:21 UTC
in Now smelling Post #181501
Im actually quite restrained when it comes to moderating

unless I can get away with it
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-22 08:58:40 UTC
in Now smelling Post #181445
I wish ant would stop abusing his admin privelages, shoo! I want all his abuse saved up :( :( :(

Never! - Ant

LOLZ - somebody else?
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-22 03:08:58 UTC
in Now smelling Post #181425
The foul stench of your fetid personality reeks all the way to the UK nickelplate

no offence
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-22 03:07:50 UTC
in Eurovision 51 Post #181424
goths are the funniest thing to come out of middle class rebellion
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-22 03:07:16 UTC
in HELP!! - Repairing Windows! Post #181423
or a knoppix linux live distro, I always keep one around for when windows decides to kill itself

how in hell you corrupted ntfs.sys I dont know, sounds like a dead drive to me
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-21 02:26:05 UTC
in New change to Homepage, or glitch? Post #181273
OH MY GOD, LORDI WON?!
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-19 17:00:10 UTC
in You're all tools Post #181006
no, you're a towel
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-19 16:53:57 UTC
in You're all tools Post #181004
i made a program that takes all the files in one directory and puts them in another, I call it 'move'
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-19 14:35:07 UTC
in Now smelling Post #180981
you smell like crapweeds and stenchblossoms
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-19 04:49:16 UTC
in PhysX is here Post #180915
but they better not integrate my card on the GPU or the entire market will implode what with the GPU having to render both trees and not trees
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-19 03:09:45 UTC
in PhysX is here Post #180907
I think we should have a seperate card for pretty trees and flowers
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-19 03:07:56 UTC
in Now smelling Post #180906
jesus smells like pine cones and intolerance
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-18 15:36:45 UTC
in Structure! Post #180817
thats a picture of the tokyo underground isnt it? I know both because I've been to that site before for reference and because you DIRECT LINKED YOU EVIL MAN
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-18 13:46:07 UTC
in Now smelling Post #180762
I disagree with everone everything every about says
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-18 07:47:05 UTC
in A New PC: Mobility or Upgradability? Post #180723
I disagree nickelplate, my current lappy is about 7 months old and it can still do pretty well with some graphically intensive games (forgetting oblivion and its 10fps) without killing itself battery wise, with my high cap and low cap i've managed to fill a 3 hour train journey playing everything from master of orion 2 to halflife 2 (moo22hl2)
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-18 07:44:45 UTC
in PhysX is here Post #180721
again, why dont you take on Nvidia with your multitude of hardware and industry knowledge, or at least send them an email telling them just how wrong they are!
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-17 19:21:57 UTC
in Now smelling Post #180660
you know what I hate? the blacks

also, queers and homophobic racists
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-17 16:46:20 UTC
in Now smelling Post #180639
I love sitting next to fat people on the tube
Posted 18 years ago2006-05-17 16:46:02 UTC
in PhysX is here Post #180638
very bad idea. gfx solution = visual display only. its limited to just displaying on screen what happens, and at the cost of gpu bandwidth at that. its a one way road. seprate card means that it feeds the data to the GPU and CPU, meaning that that crumbling building will accually kill you if it lands on you.
with you knowing so much about graphics cards, physics cards, the gaming industry and hardware in general, you really should set up a rival to NVidia because those idiots are already developing one!

If NVidia get a GPU AND PSU on the same card then their pure brand power will most likely destroy anything else, it doesnt matter whether its pulling processing power from the GPU or a seperate chip altogether, i'm sure they know a lot more about this than anyone here does.

Yes think of all the possibilities of limitless physics and the impossibility of designing anything that supports it, every idea so far is pure sandbox stuff.