Thought id put together all stories together to see how it turned out. dunno why. because im bored like that. you can thank me later.
Fourteen glasses of orange juice were walking up to dimbark and made him walk the plank into a pool of rabid sharks with lasers on their frickin' heads. However, as he was forced into the water, he was saved by Powdered Toast Man who then set him down and said:
"Listen boy, if you wanna be strong, you gotta be a waffle. If you wanna be a waffle, follow these simple steps:
Step one: Murder everybody you come across. Step two: Clean up.
If you ever ignore the happy panda that follows the magical children of Never-Neverland, I will have to show you my collection.."
It was at this time that poor Dimbark got so bored that he tripped on a bucket and went plunging through a 15th-floor window. Luckily, he landed on his fat mum.
“Hahahah” said a Crollo whom had many visions of that moment. He was later told by a corn-shucker that if he ever catches jungle fever again he'll have to ride a scooter downtown so he can get to the bar and drink as many beer as he can before Penguinboy comes in here and closes up this shop, like well he should.
A wild penguinboy appears and promptly rips his own head off. Dimbark then kills himself , by slitting off his head. there is no way he can ever be revived ever , period. ever. But then the impossible happens; he dies again, breaking the world record in deaths. The End.
Part II: The Ancient Ressurrection
Millions of years have passed, as a group of relics and dancers form around to percussion the great end.
Part III: The part where DIMBARK YOU CANNOT COME BACK TO LIFE
aliens with weird muslamic ray guns burn dimbark's corpse so badly that not even the great technolocial minds could even think of ressurecting his scorching hot body as it was eternally as hot as the sun. So they decided to nuke it instead, once every year, just to make sure. Dimbarks mum cried and later revealed her feet to those of the local foot fetish club who immediately started to gnaw against the glass they found in their pockets. They cut their gums into little individual pieces, and decided to bleed on the shag pile carpet, because, lets face it, it went out of fasion when Joe Bloggs down the road said: “ Check out mah frogs!”.
Suddenly, the frogs turned into demons which were then cut down by a young girl with a spear. Eating an apple, she imaged a beautiful, yet large man whom wore a green shirt and had amazing glasses. She then shouted out the overused phrase her imaginary friend would say to her: "Nope, Chuck Testa!" Suddenly, a different Chuck appeared, and said "Hey, I'm 71!" he then proceeded to gain a large fan following, all of whom knew the ancient art of pie farming. some grew potato pies, some grew cream pies and some grew tumors. Those poor people died, the tumors being caused by exposure to this thread. It was subsequently closed.
PART 4: THE SHIT REVEALED
Extemporaneous