To be fair, urby brings most people to tears when they look at him.
Thanks for posting this - it's a good reminder that things we say online have consequences, and what was a joke for one person might not be a joke for another. I'm glad you look back on it as constructive.
That said, I still apologise for my part in hurting your feelings - I had plenty growing up to do in 2011, too.
Don't feel nervous about posting stuff like this. If this feels like a safe space to vent, then that's great! It's certainly not a good sign if the police are being called, and try not to allow yourself to let this become normal.
It can feel insurmountable to climb out of a pit once you find yourself in it, but it is possible. I had a colleague in a terrible situation, entirely self-inflicted through his cocaine habit. He lost all his friends, he lost his job and he regularly got himself beaten up by talking shit when wasted. Ultra self-destructive. He disappeared into rehab for a few months, and honestly I stopped thinking about him. Saw him again maybe 8 months later and I didn't even recognise him. There was colour in his face again! He was smiling! That was around 2018, and I now see him semi-regularly as he got another job in the same industry, so we cross paths. He's still clean, he's still happy and he just looks so much healthier.
He was properly at rock bottom, and he got out with some professional help. It can be a really good option, and there are some truly fantastic services who can help.
Do you have family you can talk to about this stuff?
You'll be okay, mate, and it's a good thing that you've recognised how bad your drinking has gotten.
Penguinboy's advice is great.
This comment was made on an article that has been deleted.
First of all, we're all friends here. You're never alone.
I think I mentioned on a previous journal of yours - the best thing you can do to meet like-minded friendly folk is to get more involved in the things that interest you outside of the digital world. Work is a great place to start, but also there's no guarantee of having any similar interests (although working in the same industry does tend to attract similar types of people). Find something you truly love and then find local clubs and groups interested in the same stuff. For me, that was a badminton club and an indoor climbing centre - just two activities a week that helped me meet some fantastic people, many of whom are still friends to this day. It doesn't have to be fitness - there are movie clubs, tabletop gaming places, chess clubs, bowling teams, etc etc. One of the most attractive and charismatic qualities in a person is their passion for their interests. It's a great way to get out of your shell and just be honestly present and completely yourself.
You mention animation and music in your profile - brilliant!! Those have some of the most awesome communities in the world.
Commented 5 months ago2022-10-03 09:45:03 UTC
in journal: First DayComment #104827
I'm sure a lot of people here can relate to your primary school experience. Don't worry, it gets better
Big change for me at that age was finding more hobbies I could share with people outside the digital space. A lot of cool things already have great and welcoming communities around them. For me it was indoor climbing - something I still do today 15-20 years later! Maybe it's sport or music or theatre or chess or painting or woodwork or sailing - or anything! Having at least one thing separate from your digital life and your school life can be hugely beneficial.
Commented 6 months ago2022-09-05 03:33:26 UTC
in journal: Cooking time owoComment #104748
thanks Mum, for having such bad cooking that motivated me even more to start cooking myself.
One of the first TV shows I ever worked on was a kids show where they'd write in to us about their parents' terrible cooking, and we'd send a professional chef round to train the parents for a day, with the kids joining a panel of judges the following day for a cooking showdown. This reminded me of that a lot.
I adore cooking - glad to see it's bringing you so much satisfaction.
Texture and lighting changes are fine. The main structure needs to remain, although it can be modified. You can use your own judgement about whether it's in the spirit of the competition. I can't guarantee that making it completely different from the base map won't count against you in judging, it's all subjective. Put it in space, sure, but make it an asteroid or something so the canyon can remain.
Any task that 100%s the CPU for any length of time will do it. Usually on the laptops we're only ever rendering web content in 1080. Our 4k & broadcast output is edited on proper workstations.
The speed falloff as temperatures rise is consistent across all 6 MBPs that we use.
Those m1 macbook pros are genuinely good. I bought a bunch of them for work and they've been reliable location DIT machines & workstations for our Social Media Managers. The thermal throttling is a serious issue, though, so don't expect to do anything too intensive. Rendering a video longer than like 10 minutes for us ends up slowing down massively as the chip heats up and side by side with my computer it's sloooow, but It'll get better as they develop the tech.
They'll never replace the power and task-diversity of a proper computer, but it's good to see Apple actually making something worthwhile again, and even pricing it quite reasonably!
Commented 1 year ago2021-08-12 22:43:00 UTC
in vault item: Scooby_RatsComment #103669
Update:
Bad news! It's turned into a bit of a server-emptier. I think 98% of the problem is including the crossbow. In a map so open it just turns into crossbow sniping and no action
Commented 1 year ago2021-08-09 22:39:15 UTC
in vault item: dm_dust2_2020Comment #103659
Dude, this is just ridiculous. Some of the tricks and technical execution on display here are awe-inspiring. We were having a game on the TWHL server and there was a moment while i was dead, looking up into the sky... "Those clouds are fucking moving..."
Commented 1 year ago2021-08-08 21:56:17 UTC
in vault item: Scooby_RatsComment #103654
Absolutely great. Really looking forward to playing this with more people. Particularly love all the animated bits - owl out the window, the door slats, etc. Lovely, lovely work.
This is really excellent. I love the aesthetic, and you've managed to fit a lot of layout into a relatively small space. The inaccessible, but visible areas like the conveyer belts are a really nice bit of world-building, too. It feels very much like a classic Quake arena or Unreal Tournament map - one of the levels my colleagues and I would spend hours after work playing on the LAN. I particularly like the weapon and item placement - it feels like a lot of thought went into the gameplay, and retaining that classic deathmatch feeling.
If I had one bit of constructive criticism, it would just be that you've used all those lovely rendermode solid grates for ceiling and wall detail, but none of them cast shadows. That could've been a nice bit of extra spice on top of what is already a really cool environment.
Awesome work.
Added to the rotation of the TWHL server: 109.169.42.68:53500
Commented 1 year ago2021-05-16 22:28:35 UTC
in vault item: bootbox_vanilyaComment #103566
The main arena could use some work to make the gameplay a little more interesting. It's mainly just a killbox at the moment - additional cover and routes would keep the players moving and would present more varied encounters than just gauss sniping. The verticality of the main arena has a lot of potential - having more levels than just the one bridge at the top would incentivise players to get creative with gauss jumping and would certainly help with the lack of cover and pathing.
Texturing is okay, but the lighting is bad. A lot of players will never find the secret area which is the only part of the map with lighting - keeping the arena fullbright makes the map seem unfinished. The original Bootbox3 at least had basic lighting in the main arena, and looks much better as a result. Remember the arena is the main focus of the map, and is the first thing players will see, so it should be properly lit and textured.
Definitely potential here, but it needs some work.
Commented 2 years ago2021-01-22 03:01:33 UTC
in journal: Deathmatch with my sonComment #103199
I swear I used to have reaction times like that....
I played vertico a bunch back in the day - this was a nostalgia trip! Great to see you and Scott having a blast together - some of my fondest memories are fragging my dad in Elite Force and Jedi Outcast.
Also also! My partner and I got a kitten a couple of months ago and we named her River. I only now realised that I probably had that name lodged in my head from you, so thankyou
Thanks for posting this - it's a good reminder that things we say online have consequences, and what was a joke for one person might not be a joke for another. I'm glad you look back on it as constructive.
That said, I still apologise for my part in hurting your feelings - I had plenty growing up to do in 2011, too.
It's certainly not a good sign if the police are being called, and try not to allow yourself to let this become normal.
It can feel insurmountable to climb out of a pit once you find yourself in it, but it is possible. I had a colleague in a terrible situation, entirely self-inflicted through his cocaine habit. He lost all his friends, he lost his job and he regularly got himself beaten up by talking shit when wasted. Ultra self-destructive.
He disappeared into rehab for a few months, and honestly I stopped thinking about him. Saw him again maybe 8 months later and I didn't even recognise him. There was colour in his face again! He was smiling! That was around 2018, and I now see him semi-regularly as he got another job in the same industry, so we cross paths. He's still clean, he's still happy and he just looks so much healthier.
He was properly at rock bottom, and he got out with some professional help. It can be a really good option, and there are some truly fantastic services who can help.
Do you have family you can talk to about this stuff?
You'll be okay, mate, and it's a good thing that you've recognised how bad your drinking has gotten.
Penguinboy's advice is great.
I think I mentioned on a previous journal of yours - the best thing you can do to meet like-minded friendly folk is to get more involved in the things that interest you outside of the digital world. Work is a great place to start, but also there's no guarantee of having any similar interests (although working in the same industry does tend to attract similar types of people). Find something you truly love and then find local clubs and groups interested in the same stuff. For me, that was a badminton club and an indoor climbing centre - just two activities a week that helped me meet some fantastic people, many of whom are still friends to this day.
It doesn't have to be fitness - there are movie clubs, tabletop gaming places, chess clubs, bowling teams, etc etc. One of the most attractive and charismatic qualities in a person is their passion for their interests. It's a great way to get out of your shell and just be honestly present and completely yourself.
You mention animation and music in your profile - brilliant!! Those have some of the most awesome communities in the world.
You'll do great
Big change for me at that age was finding more hobbies I could share with people outside the digital space. A lot of cool things already have great and welcoming communities around them. For me it was indoor climbing - something I still do today 15-20 years later! Maybe it's sport or music or theatre or chess or painting or woodwork or sailing - or anything! Having at least one thing separate from your digital life and your school life can be hugely beneficial.
I adore cooking - glad to see it's bringing you so much satisfaction.
I'm using it with JACK and so far all models and sprites seem to be displaying correctly
The competition page is correct.
Super sweet, Suparsonik
The speed falloff as temperatures rise is consistent across all 6 MBPs that we use.
They'll never replace the power and task-diversity of a proper computer, but it's good to see Apple actually making something worthwhile again, and even pricing it quite reasonably!
(hipply burfles)
DoB:
19th September 1991Joined:
15th August 2004Age when joined: 4714 days
Today:
20th Oct 2021Age today: 10989 days
I've been a TWHLer for 57.1% of my life.
Tastes mature as we do - you'll just have to get obsessively into train simulators instead of shooters
Bad news! It's turned into a bit of a server-emptier. I think 98% of the problem is including the crossbow. In a map so open it just turns into crossbow sniping and no action
Awesome. Awesome, awesome, awesome.
Particularly love all the animated bits - owl out the window, the door slats, etc. Lovely, lovely work.
Added to the TWHL server rotation
Texturing — 9
Ambience — 9
Lighting — 7
Gameplay — 9
It feels very much like a classic Quake arena or Unreal Tournament map - one of the levels my colleagues and I would spend hours after work playing on the LAN.
I particularly like the weapon and item placement - it feels like a lot of thought went into the gameplay, and retaining that classic deathmatch feeling.
If I had one bit of constructive criticism, it would just be that you've used all those lovely rendermode solid grates for ceiling and wall detail, but none of them cast shadows. That could've been a nice bit of extra spice on top of what is already a really cool environment.
Awesome work.
Added to the rotation of the TWHL server:
109.169.42.68:53500
Jump pads were always a big element of the padmaps that this is inspired by, so they were always going to be included!
Texturing is okay, but the lighting is bad. A lot of players will never find the secret area which is the only part of the map with lighting - keeping the arena fullbright makes the map seem unfinished. The original Bootbox3 at least had basic lighting in the main arena, and looks much better as a result. Remember the arena is the main focus of the map, and is the first thing players will see, so it should be properly lit and textured.
Definitely potential here, but it needs some work.
I played vertico a bunch back in the day - this was a nostalgia trip! Great to see you and Scott having a blast together - some of my fondest memories are fragging my dad in Elite Force and Jedi Outcast.
Also also!
My partner and I got a kitten a couple of months ago and we named her River. I only now realised that I probably had that name lodged in my head from you, so thankyou
Best of luck