Comments

point blank? you're hiding behind a mask, what part of point blank allows you to hide in the shadows and hurl allegations of insanity at people.

I have a solution:

So at 6:30am on January 14th, I woke up to the doorbell buzzing. Not a short lived buzz. Someone had their thumb pressing the button and holding it there. "Fucking drunkard" I thought, and rolled over, intent on ignoring it. It then started a rythmic buzz buzz buzz buzz, over and over again. After about 5 minutes battling to get back to sleep, I gave up and got up. Put my pants on, grabbed my sweatshirt, and stumbled off toward the door.

As I walked down the steps I heard them talking to the nextdoor neighbor, asking him where the landlord lived. I reach the door just as the neighbor's door closes. I compose myself to deal with whatever is behind the door, and open it.

Immediately there's a flashlight in my eyes. "Are you Chris Toshok?" "Uh, yes" "Mr. Toshok, we're with the FBI. We have a warrant to search the premises." I looked down out of the glare of the flashlight and saw the FBI badge of the long haired blonde woman standing in front of me. I also saw two people behind her, bodies turned sideways so as to present less of a target. Guns drawn? It was too hard to tell really with the glare of the flashlight, but I'm assuming yes.

I mumbled something about turning on the light so I could see the warrant (pages 1 2 3 4 5)they'd thrust into my hands and turned and groped on the wall for the switch. They all tensed. The light came on, and I looked over the warrant for a second.

"Please come out here Mr. Toshok," and a hand on my arm pulling me onto the porch. Once I was out on the porch several agents started up the stairs. I said that my roommate was still asleep in bed. They asked his name, I said "Peter". They continued up the steps, yelling his name. "Peter, this is the FBI." "PETER" "PETER, are you awake? this is the FBI"

I didn't watch it happen but apparently Peter awoke, naked, to a doorway full of FBI agents with guns out, yelling at him to get up. He asked if he could get some clothes on. They said yes. He asked if they could turn on the light so he could see. So Peter got to get dressed under the watchful gaze of government employees. Must have been fun.

They took Peter to the back of the house, and took me back upstairs to the front of the house, and proceeded to start going through everything in my room and the office.

I was questioned by the FBI agent in charge and a Secret Service agent at length about the Hungry Programmers, people I used to live with, whether particular people had the capacity/knowledge to do what they were investigating, etc. During the questioning she says "Now we're going to take all your computers." She sees the look on my face and says "Yeah, this is going to be hard for you." I said "uh, when will I get them back?" She said it depends, that they'd try to have them all back as soon as possible, but it depends on if they find anything suspicious on them. If they found contraband (kiddie porn, talk of drugs, or stuff they were actually looking for), that particular computer would never be coming home.

After the questioning I basically sat in the front room on a folded futon mattress, with at least one agent with me at all times. Sometimes two. At one point I said I really needed to brush my teeth and the SS agent assigned to me at the time walked with me back to the bathroom and stood behind me watching me in the mirror as I brushed my teeth. On my way back down the hall I looked into my room and saw 3 FBI agents rifling through my belongings. One looking at the condoms and stickers in my nightstand, one going through my underwear/sock drawer, and one looking through my books.

After a lot more sitting in silence in that room, interspersed with tidbits of conversation (an fbi agent asking me about the guitars, talking about the piano lessons in his youth, and how he was kicked in the chest by a horse.) I must say, the SS agents were a lot nicer than the FBI agents. One in particular was pretty cool - we joked a lot about just how absurd the whole thing was.. He asked how I was doing, I said I'd had better mornings, to which he responded "well you'll definitely have one unique experience more than most people." I definitely have to agree. I know of very few others that have been through something like this. The blonde FBI agent was nice (and annoying) enough to tell me repeatedly that the judge would go easier on me (and they could all go home earlier) if I would just tell them where the stuff was. If I had it, of course. But if I denied having it, they'd really throw the book at me when they found it.

After more waiting, the FBI agent in charge comes into the room and explains that they aren't actually pressing charges against me, so I'm not being detained. I can leave if I want, or walk around the house, etc. This is a relief. I go grab my shoes and socks (my feet were freezing by this time). After a few more minutes of listening to the bumbling idiots in the next room arguing over how to turn off my machines, I decide a walk might be nice. I say I'm leaving to go walk around, that I'll be back to look over the list of equipment they're seizing. I ask if they'll let me take my cell phone so they can call me if I need to be back, etc.. They said no. I wasn't to take any property off the premises. Luckily, I still had my car keys. I walked over to my car and drove off.

Drove around for a while, then decided I'd stop by Seth's house and tell him what was going on. Davel answered the door, bleary-eyed. I apologized for waking him up.. I said "I would have called, but the FBI wouldn't let me use my cell phone." He said "what???".. I handed him the search warrant. He said "ohhh, god, come in." and walked me up the stairs.

I broke the news to Seth and he looked as shocked as I felt when I opened the door at 6:30. Got on ICB and spread the word that the wolves were circling, and everyone pretty well freaked out.

I hung out with them for a while, then figured I'd better be getting back so I got back in the car and returned home. It was probably around 10am at this point. 3.5 hours into the raid. I got there as agents were walking laps up and down the outside steps, carrying full boxes of my possessions into their van. I was too late to go over the actual stuff they were confiscating. suck. I walked upstairs, and found the long haired blonde agent and the (admittedly very cute) asian evidence photographer still there, finishing up. Taking photos of the rooms in their condition post-raid, writing down which exposures corresponded to which room.

The blonde agent handed me the seizure receipt to look over and sign. It looked ok to me, but I really had no idea at the time that some items they'd taken weren't on the list.

We joked with the agents some before they left. Asked them for their business cards, which they declined to give us, saying they would likely be plastered all over the web. Wise women. We asked if we could get a picture of them or their badges, which they also denied us. Too bad. Peter walked them to the steps, and I walked into the office to assess the emptiness.

There were a few times in college when the computer labs would be closed during the day, due to a bomb threat or a gas leak or whatever. When this happened all the geeks would wander around outside, eyes squinting in the unaccustomed glare of the mid-day sun, looking like zombies. You could always spot a geek on such a day by the way they walked with a certain slowness in their step. Not a leisure slowness, a dead slowness.

Today was like that for me. I'd lost upwards of 9 machines, and lots of misc equipment besides. Machines that, according to most people familiar with this stuff, I may as well write off as gone regardless of whether or not they ever find anything on them. Thankfully there were many people around that were willing and able to find the humor in such a preposterous day. I've been running on laughter all day, unwilling to think about the fact that this all might end with me in court, or even in jail. I mean, I did nothing illegal, how can I end up in jail? Leila forced me to at least acknowledge the gravity of what was going on, but thankfully didn't force me to dwell on it. I'm hoping I can keep myself laughing about it all until I pass out. The drinking might start rather early tomorrow.

I don't think the word "surreal" ever described a day better for me.

Ok
All right
Oh no
This one, this one, this one

Heads of state who ride and wrangle
Who look at your face for more than one angle
Can cut you from their bloated budgets
Like sharpened knives through chicken mcnuggets

Now, heads of state who ride and wrangle
Who look at your face for more than one angle
Can cut you from their bloated budgets
Like sharpened knives through chicken mcnuggets

(Shut the fuck) up
Yo, shut the fuck up
(Shut the fuck)
Right, right, learn to buck up
(Shut the fuck)
Right, shut the fuck up, hey, ho
(Shut the fuck)
Now, now learn to buck up

(1, 2, a-1, 2, 3, 4!)

Now, nimble fingers that dance hall numbers
Will eat your children and steal your thunder
While heavy torsos that heave and hurl
Will crunch like nuts in the mouths of squirrels

Now, nimble fingers that dance hall numbers
Will eat your children and steal your thunder
While heavy torsos that heave and hurl
Will crunch like nuts in the mouths of squirrels

(Shut the fuck) up
Yo, shut the fuck up
(Shut the fuck)
Right now learn to buck up
(Shut the fuck)
Right, shut the fuck up yeah, ho! Yow!
(Shut the fuck) Yow! Yow! Yow!
Learn to buck up

Now, simple feet that flicker like fire
And burn like candles in smokey's fires
Do more to turn my joy to sadness
Than somber thoughts of burning planets

Now, clever feet that flicker like fire
And burn like candles in smokey's fires
Do more to turn my joy to sadness
Than somber thoughts of burning planets

(Shut the fuck)
All right
Ok
I don't(Shut the fuck) wanna
I don't wanna hear it that's right
(Shut the fuck)
Oh no, ok, I don't wanna
(Shut the fuck)
I don't wanna
(Shut the fuck)
Yeeaahh, ho, yow!
(Shut the fuck)
I don't wanna...I don't wanna...

Ooooh ooh oooooooh ooh ooooooohhh ooh

yawn.

why no comment here? you said you weren't afraid?

yawn... again.. yet more tripe, ain't even gonna glance over this one.

yawn... it's getting old noob...

why do you insist on fighting? you lost, fair and square, and you can't take it so you keep whinging on about this shit, you're lame dude, a real fucking lamer, I'll carry this on as long as you want to keep calling me names like nazi! and bully! I mena come boy, a bully ffs, I have an opinion, you want me to just stop being who I am (and by that I mena I have a strong opinion, I'm no fuckign bully) because some little prick on teh internet says so, if you wanna talk shit, say it to my face, cunt...

we'll see who does the bullying..

so you were on a mission to over-ride the mods authority?

i'll be interested to see what they have to say for themselves, are you in fact accusing them of not doing their job properly? or just being bad at it?

you really have no sense of humour either, i'm as much of a retard as you think you're not.

so listen 'guy' , who gives a fuck what you have to say, you're a wanker! it's as simple as that, and as pathetic too.

I used to know people liek you, but they're all in dole queues now...

I'd love for you to let me shwo you hwo much of a bully I can be.

what did you get?
someone to talk to for a couple of weeks?

fuck off with your bullshit quotes, the shit's right up there, and if you read more than that one line you'll see I don't mention flaming as an opposite to positive comments, retard. jesus, we could all mis-quote, look:

"i was after shitting on helpless people i called noobs"

That's a pretty easy way to make a point, and yet, as I read your posts, I notice one major flaw, you're still treating me in the way you think I treat 'newbs', so, really, you're fighting yourself.. but I guess you have your reasons, there's no way to argue with morons like you, you need help man, it's the internet, it's a mapping site, you're a fucking wierdo.

I sowre in that post? hmm, see man, you talk (look out!) shit, and I'm getting quite bored of telling you, you seem to just spam flames, and not read anythign else.

only one explanation, you can't read. so you couldn't see the posts i made, and assumed I flamed.

And, what noob flaming?!, this is what really cracks me up, like I'm gonna start flaming noobs to prove you wrong, how dumb do you think I am? face it, I ain't as dumb as you.

I don't act cool at all, it comes naturally.

You're talking about it as if you somehow won somethign, liek you went out from teh start to acheive some kind of change in my attitude, thanks for caring about me, but honestly, I can take care of myself.

So you went out from teh start to attack me? but in your first post directed towards me you were satying things like 'the old memebrs' and 'elitst member', but now it's just me?

could it be that everyone else ignored you, but i'm the only one who has the balls (or the stupidity) tyo stand up for myself against a fuckign retard liek you?

watch your mouth, punk.

oh my god.

am i starting to irritate you or is it my imagination that your posts are getting longer?

you can fuck off if you think i'll let you get within a mile of me, come and try 'slamming the proverbial fist' down my throat, you talk shit, liek a fucking noob lol

get off your high horse and see how you're becoming what you say you hate.

I suggest you read Animal Farm, it may open your eyes to exactly what you have become.

slam the proverbial fist, hah, don't make me laugh you pathetic smear of shit.

call me out?

and again?

omfg roflmao on the floor crying my eyes out coz it's so damn funny!

what have you won?

what have you achieved?

If I wanted to prove a poitn I'd get myself banned for swearing and flaming, but I'm not as dumb as you dude...

so I'm a schizo, does that make me less of a human being?

besides, check the dates retard, I posted as a result of you coming into my maps and talking shit about them, almost as if you were taking 'personal offence because I ripped on some guys map', so I retaliated against you.

You're not untouchable, you're a retard, deal with t.

hahah, wow, you've got some real vision probs, nutter.

also, can't say I remember telling anyone to "fuck off and die", but that is pretty funny, admit it...

You should read aotm's thread 'ToDo' ; it talks about ppl's first maps being put into a seperate 'beginner' section, so that the vault only gets good maps, not someone's noob-cube (hey, we all made 'em).
So if atom is talking about it, I'm pretty sure that means alot of people would have contaced him about it, so I guess I'm not alone in being sick of seeing fy_maps

Don't think I've ever ripped a non fy map in teh vault, and if I did, it would have been a pretty weak map.

Another thing, if there was no difference in opinions it would be a pretty boring world, tehre needs to be a ying to a yang, if everyone posted positive comments, the people that learnt to map so they could make one small piece of shit for their LAN game, would keep coming back with more shit, and they would never learn.

I got shit when I started, I'm pretty sure everyoen does, but just because you got it doesn't mean you have to turn yourself into some kind of crusader, it's pointless, you've achieved nothing, I have no respect for you, and anything I do is my own choice, or at the request of mods... as I keep saying..

So really, you lose your little battle. But seeing as you were the only one fighting, I guess taht means you lost a battle to yourself, you whipped your own ass, you fucked up, you smacktard. fuck off.

Lol, I'm a bully am I? If your interpretation of a bully is someone who tells 'noobs' what he thinks of them, and tells 'newbs' how to solve problems, I guess I'm a bully.

You're just a bitter little 'noob' who's pissed off because I haven't given in liek all the other poor souls you've harrassed, get over it, get a life, stfu. noob.

I listen to mods, not wankers.

coulda sworn i commented on this, but basically here''s the deal:

You stop being a total noob, and I FORGET YOU EVER EXISTED.

[oops caps, but it works]

lol

well...

no-one stands a chance anymore.. =/

Hmm, I'd like to see what you mean, because I've done a couple of maps with seriously large open areas, and I've got a couple of tricks to keep the speeds down, I must remember to play it when i get home heh

boo00ring

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is it because you're like, 15, or because you don't want to give out too much about yourself, you'd rather just sit on the sidelines and point the finger?

You truly are brainless.

I called your maps useless.

This is just above useful, but seeing as the noobs don't search anymore... they never find it huh, too many 'how to make instant damage water' examples, because it's so damn hard to make water kill someone.. or to explain in words...

lol... uh, yeah cause i flame so many helpless noobs like you do oh, and i see since i've called you out about it, i don't see your big dumb mouth talking so much shit to noobs anymore AHHAHHH!

What>? This is what gets me man, first time you started talking shit at me, was after that shithead funessen flew off teh handle in a thread I hadn't posted in before.. I gave him a piece of my mind.
So, like, what.. again? moron dude, fucking moron...

lol... and FINISH taking my advive and "clean up" the other 5

k. while I'm doing mine, you wanna 'clean out' those three useless excuses for examples?

rofl... poor dumb insane guy

who takes personal offense at what someone else says about someone elses map? It's a map buddy, it'snot like I'm calling his dead motehr a rotting whore, is it? jesus, you make me laugh sometimes, well all the time.

W0w, you've got some kind of chip dude.

Did you see what I put on maps that were actually good?

mY comments on "shit" (you'll notice it was: 'looks like shit', and 'looks liks shit' - big dif there), are reserved for maps that are actually shit. fy maps that people should know better than to release, and most being cs fy maps, of which there isn't enough of in the world... of course.

So before you talk shit because I pissed on one of your piece of shit noob-cube's compiled in fullbright with 1 awp in middle, think about what I'm talking about: a piece of shit map, that they shouldn't have wasted their time on.

Great, they love it, their friends love it, I'm really happy for them, honestly, I am; but that doesn't mean they should put it in a HalfLife mapping vault and then expect to get great reviews because they did something that people have been doing for 6 years.

You really think you've got me nailed into some kind of corner here don't you?

Well enjoy it, coz you're bound to wake up and see the colour of the faeces pouring out of your mouth.

PS: I say 'shit' alot, because it's rude to say cunt, you cunt.

I still don't get what you're talking about?

Proof, boy, proof...

ifd

reminds me of a lesser detailed splinter cell map

well it's had 8 so far haha

I won't coment, other tahn, yes it looks like a first map

that looks dangerously fuullbright

when releasing a map liek this, please look at the reviews other maps like it got.

It looks very nice from that, nice attention to detail, I'll be sure to d/l this when I get home.

well, how old are you .. ?

Pity around 200 people have this map in their folders, huh

Ever heard of a server, and paying money? Do you even have a job? What do you do for teh community hmm>?

"also i put it here for someone who was asking about my maps on mIRC"
- I try to get involved with teh otehr guys who are here, and share my work, however "bad" it is. You make no such attempt.

I'll be honest with you now Anon, or whoever you actually are, because you're obviously in need of educating:

I have made in the region of 30 to 40 maps in just under two years, that ain't great. It's maybe one every two weeks, now I don't continuosly make maps, sometimes I make several in a week, or one over several weeks. But it remains true that every one of them that passed the test (a clan play test) was uploaded onto teh server and stayed tehre until a new version was brought out, or we got bored of it.

I don't make maps for release, I make them (well, used to) for my clan, I also play in two bands, skateboard to a semi-weak ability, and smoke pot, drink too much beer and try and have a god time, therefore whatever you say about my maps, is not really going to affect me, or make me stop mapping.

I know that when I release a map that i have worked hard on, it will be better than anything I have done before. I never claimed to be a prodigy (or even a good mapper), you took my comments out of context, I see a shit map, I say something, I see a good map, I say something.

I'm not flaming people for mapping, or making "better" maps than mine, I'm giving them the benefit of my experience, and what I know looks bad in a map, all maps look the same at a base level, therefore all maps can be improved.

Some peopel can't take criticism, I'm not saying I like to be criticised, who does?

But just because you've received bad reviews for your 'noob cubes' in the past, doesn't mean you have to constantly attack people about theirs.

You are a sad, pathetic individual, who isn't going to pay any attention to what I'm saying, because you've got it into your head that I (and a few otehrs) are against you.

I'd suggest calming down, taking a deep breath, and look at what you're doing here.
Does it help the community to start flame-wars? Is it useful to turn new members against the people who are here to help them?
Does it pay to get yourself a reputation as a flaming noob who only posts to annoy people and stir up ill-feeling, and resentment, anxiety and hatred.

I'm truly sick of this situation, and I've not experienced this kind of childish behaviour since I was 10.

I don't care what you say, please try and understand that, and when you admit who you are, we'll all sit down and see what we can do to resolve this issue.

If you continue, it'll a self-destructive decline.

Are you two teh same person?

Or does it just seem that way, anyway.. blah blah

It's an example map, whatis there to constructively criticise?
And where is your "constructicve" criticism?

You make no coherent arguement, and no sense, please elaborate.

Ok, I'll delete my map and start again.

Thanks for taking the time to d/l it, I know you didn't because there's a shitload of errors taht (if I had the time and patience) I would fix, however, it takes 2 1/2 hours to compile, and I have no time anymore.

Thanks for your ideas though, I'll use them in my next map, sorry, what were your suggestions again?

What advice?

I cleaned my space up, so I wasn't hogging space that other members could use constructively...

You really do have a chip your shoulder.

I requested you be banned a long time ago.

I request it again.

If I ever find out who you are, I'll give you a big kiss and thank you for being such an entertaininglittle chap.

Grow a dick, mate.. seriously, get laid, chill out, you got issues.

LOL

this is in example maps, took no more than 30 minutes to put together, and was done as an example for someone in the forums, uhm.. it ain't supposed to be pretty, but why do I get the feeling you couldn't recreate it if you tried?

Moron.

I notice you haven't flamed cs_jungle_assault, why not?

Too big for your 56k to d/l, or is it just the fact that I actually attempted mapping something old, and turned it into something new, unlike your crock of shit aztec rip offs?

And this map, once again, is in examples... not unfinished or complete, ya frickin' moron.

Go on msn if you to noobs want to flame.

rick_u_@hotmail.com

Sorry, I didn't bother to read that, as it was another stock answer from another stock standard forum noob.

Here is my reply in englsh format:

"lol look how ugly YOUR ATTITUDE is :D"

you have the minstrels.

leave the chickens alone.

I believe you can fly, fly, jump, now

PS: suck my hairy, sweaty, black balls, bitch.

sorry, I didn't read taht as it was far too complex for a noob like me to understand, I'll hazard a guess and answer your question:

Like i said, the guy came at ME, not the otehr way round, so what was I supposed to do?! I kicked him in the head (karate) and rammed the metal pole into his eye.

Last time he tried to sell ME a big issue

And on another note:

I'm 21, how old are you?

sorry i didnt read that, it was too noobish to contemplate, but i'll hazard a guess at what you wrote, and try to answer accordingly:

No, I only 'found' the cat there, and it was already dead when I arrived,

and:

NO! for the hundredth time, I will NOT take your skanky whore mother up teh arse, I don't want the disease again.

Better luck next time at trying to piss me off, and raise some eyebrows, you're just talking shite each tiem you step up to teh mic, liek some kinda bitch.

so back away from teh mic bitch, back away.

and, uh, at , well, uhm, yeah, what , hh

talk normally retard.

What's it about?

"its for noobs!"

Yeha, you, you fuckign moron, who in their right mind would not be able to figure out something as basic as this?

how about yo put a bit more effort into showing what else could be done with it?

if it's an example map, try and make it a better example, prick.

and you say you didn't make this map with architecture in mind, I think you just tried to impress ppl by using a cylinder, well taht backfired, didn't it... you wanked around with a cylinder, and you ain't got a fuckign clue how to map, make maps, or talk about maps.

Stop trying to sound big and clever, when all you're doing is making yourself look lie a total noob who can't map for shit, and is pissed off because you can't map. liek a mapping nub.

tbh blah blah
whine whine, bitch bithc, is taht all you ever do?

or do you have any mor talents?

like licking yuor own arsehole?

go away.

I'd say you just wasted your time talking about nonsense when everyone with a brain won't look at your piece of shit map, and anyone without a brain will downlaod it and not have a clue what to use it for, how about you take this crappy, ill textured, badly mappe, square, ugly, puke colored heap of fucking rotting cunt and fuck off.